torsdag den 29. oktober 2009

October 29th

Wow, I guess I haven't kept my promise about updating.
It's just that whenever I tried to write something, it felt slightly pointless.

Transfering back has been weird. Really weird.
I went a whole lot easier than I thought it would, but it was a challenge. I'm conviced that the fact that I just started high school this year made it a lot easier also. I got to meet new people, and it wasn't exactly "going back to your old life". Only in some ways.
Most of my old friendships died out, which can be really annoying when my (okay get ready for this) new friends have plans to hang out with their old friends (from before they went to high school) and I don't have any old friends to hang out with.
It makes me feel really fucking lonely. And not only this. Just the fact that I went on this journey by my self, and only I fully understand what happened this year. No one understands why I appreciate certains things so much.. I'm sure they just think I'm convinced that "my life is way more interesting than theirs and thats why I have to keep telling them about it blah blah".
Finding where this thin line between sharing experiences and bragging, can be hard to find.

I love Denmark, I really do. I feel comfortable in my life. My school (Rysensteen Gymnasium - supposedly one of the best public schools in CPH) is awesome, social life is good, and there isn't a lot to complain about. There really isn't. And I AM aware of that.
Yet, I miss the US. Terribly.
The weird part is that I don't know where I'd rather be.
All I know is that everytime I see a footage in TV set in the US, the American Flag, hear someone speak American English, or just get reminded of the US in general; I really miss it.
Not only do I miss my lovely host family, my beloved friends and Wesminster; I also miss speaking English, watching a football game, going to Willy's or Starbucks, driving around in my friends cars listening to music, baking break'n'bake with Carolina at night, sleeping in the basement, hanging out in Athens.. I just miss it.
What's really tough is that I don't see ANY of these things in my life in Denmark. They're so far away from me, yet they lie so deep in my heart.

Staying positive and focusing on how priviledged I am to be able to live my life, is how I stay sane ;)

I hope I have something interesting to update about soon!

xoxo
Camille